We’ve all received gifts that simply do not suit us. For me, collectibles fall into that category. I don’t have enough space for the stuff I already have, please don’t give me any more. That doesn’t mean they aren’t the perfect gift - for someone else. This brings us the age old dilemma – when is it OK to regift?
Is Regifting Acceptable: Yes and No
Regifting can be a practical and economical solution to the problem of presents you don’t want. You have no use for it, why not give it to someone who will use it? But too often the motivation is nothing short of cheapness, a way to save a buck. Re-gifting isn’t a means to pawn off junk on unsuspecting friends and relatives. There are other ways of disposing of trash. But even when you have the best intentions, regifting is a tricky minefield to navigate.
Regifting Done Right
First and foremost, the object you plan to pass along must be unused. Anything less is cheap and tacky. An exception of course would be antiques or vintage items, which were probably used by someone. Also never give something that has been displayed in your home, the recipient might recognize that one of a kind clock the minute the wrapping comes off. Second, you should regift outside the social circle, the people surrounding the original gift giver. Otherwise you risk your aunt Jackie discovering you gave away that clown shaped coffee mug to your cousin Evelyn. Finally, the item you regift should be something the recipient will truly appreciate. Regifting is a way of passing along an object to a home where it will find use and value, not a way to unload stuff you don’t want. Goodwill is a good alternative for the things that you, and no one else you know, would treasure. So next time you receive that great for someone else gift, set is aside for that special person. Regifting done right is both socially acceptable and environmentally friendly.
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5 comments:
I sell items I don't want (that typically come from people who won't know that I don't have it anymore, anyway - so this is just for my conscience, that I do this rather than re-gift, because I see it as the lesser of two evils) on Ebay. Example: A neighbor gave me a suncatcher for taking care of her plants while she was out of town. I sold the item and got maybe $4-7 for it. I was glad to have a few dollars. She probably spent $10-20 for it and I really wish she wouldn't have (the waste of money is evident.)
Personally, I would rather buy the next person something they would like, and pay more money for it than the $4 I netted by selling the knickknack, because it goes against my grain to pass off something as a gift that I didn't select especially for that person. And in my mind, my neighbor doesn't have to know that I am really enjoying her gift more in the form of cash, but I appreciated her gesture (but appreciate cash more than a suncatcher.) It's not her fault that she didn't know I'd prefer cash (or maybe she thinks cash is a tacky gift to give.)
I guess you can tell that I'm not huge into gift-giving. If I have performed a service, just give me a few dollars and I'll be happier with that than a weird gift. Like most people, I'm hard to buy for. I don't expect gifts from people - I'd rather buy what I want for myself, and I sort of expect that others will do the same, so I don't do a lot of gift-giving (unless I'm sure I know what they want! I don't guess by picking out the first knickknack I see at a gift shop.)
The same neighbor also gave me a bottle of white wine, and it's been sitting in my fridge for six months. It crossed my mind that I could give it to someone as a gift, but I just don't like to operate that way - to me it is dishonest, not to mention that I'd be very embarrassed if the person found out, and I have no idea how, that I didn't buy it for them, but it had been given to me by someone else.
I guess I have no need for what I see as phoniness and low-level deception. What will probably happen is I'll find a friend who likes wine and tell her the exact truth and tell her she is welcome to take it, because I don't want it. No credit for gift-giving, but at least it's aboveboard.
Regifting is a great idea, as long as that giver doesn't come to your house and ask where the item is!
John DeFlumeri Jr
You also have to make super sure that all notes are removed and that the gift wasn't personalized. Wouldn't you be so embarassed to get a blanket with the gift giver's child's name on it. AWK!
What makes you an authority on this subject?
For the most part, people giving gifts are giving the receiver what they would want and not necessarily the receiver. I don't understand why people just don't give cold hard cash? You think picking up that gift card at the supermarket checkout stand or from your favorite store is going to make it any more special for the receiver? Absolutely not! It's just a bigger pain in the ass.
Why dictate to the receiver what they're going to get? Wouldn't the receiver much rather have the cash and be able to spend it on what they really want or need? And why should the giver really care if the same money that would have been spent on a gift were just given as cash? It would make life a whole lot easier for everyone - less time, less hassle, more convenience...for everyone.
You'd thnk an expert in personal finance would be able to see the simplicity and value in that.
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