I overheard some interesting conversation at a housewarming party earlier this week. An old friend “L” just moved into a new apartment and had a few girls over to see the new place. L has a long history of living beyond her means with the mountains of debt to prove it. She is one of the few people I know to turn to debt consolidation, which helped pull her out of the hole. Unfortunately it sounds like she has fallen back in again. But what struck me most was her, and some of her guest’s,current attitude towards financial responsibility.
Somehow the subject of debt was brought up and L remarked that debt has been a continual force in our lives since our college days. I proudly told her that I had finally kicked the habit and paid off over $20,000 in credit card debt in a year. “Whatever”, she said, “I’ve paid off at least $30,000 in the last three years”. I got the impression that was only a portion of the debt she is carrying (truly frightening when you consider I make 2-3 times her income). But she is no longer scared about her poor credit or being in debt. In her mind, the recession has put everyone in a similar place and only one small emergency away from financial ruin. It’s the new normal and she is just the average American. Besides, if she loses her job she will just declare bankruptcy. No big deal, everyone is doing it.
Then there was her friend R, who is going through the mortgage modification process. She asked if I had done mine yet and when I told her that I don’t qualify for any of the programs, she insisted that I was wrong. Apparently she doesn’t qualify either, but is forging the paperwork to make it appear that she does. She has no guilt about it, not in a world where corporate responsibility has gone out the window. Her basic mindset was, the banks got their bailout, why shouldn’t I? It’s hard to argue with the sentiment, but that doesn’t make it right. I got the impression that she can’t afford the house, loan modification or not. She is creating a fake business to make her income appear high enough to qualify for the program. I have the opposite problem, too much income and too many assets. It does make one wonder why they chose the responsible path.
This recession and resulting corporate rescues have taught Americans a bad lesson, that financial responsibility is pointless. First you have people like L, who see the financial ruin of others as a rubber stamp for their own bad decisions. Then you have people like R, who see corporate bailouts as a license to cheat the system. Both types are learning that financial responsibility is for suckers, those not creative enough to work the system.
So what is your take? Have Americans lost all sense of financial responsibility and is the government bailout of irresponsible banks to blame?
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9 comments:
I don't blame them...this is a case of "you have nothing to lose".
I really liked your thoughts on this subject. I have witnessed this change in mentality but i'm also in a different place in the word.
I do find it faciniating, and am not surprised that people are feeling they deserve a bail out too.
It's quite trajic really - so many people beleive they deserve so much - when it's really not the case. i'm appalled that someone would have the gall to forge information to give the appearance of qualifying for help.
How is this person forging the income? Wouldn't they be requesting tax returns and compare them to the IRS? There is so much verification involved I can't believe she thinks she will get away with it. It is truly frustrating that there are people that think like this.
What others do should have no influence on the way I carry my conduct base on my values. The end.
Aside from the fairness issue, the biggest problem with "bailouts" (whether they're debt modifications, hand-outs, etc.) is that it creates a moral hazard. Your friends are perfect examples of this. But as my braniac ex-boyfriend said, even with these "handouts", these irresponsible (and dishonest) people will still be worse off than financially responsible people like you. It is a sad, though, to witness how non-chalant many people are with respect to dishonesty and irresponsibility.
Your friend Ms. Forger, better be careful, in Florida, where I live, the state is suing mortgage fraud applicants and processors!
Jail time, big fines, and defense costs!
John DeFlumeri Jr
While I don't personally ascribe to the feelings that "L" and "R" have, I can certainly understand and appreciate them! It comes down to the richest wage-earners getting all the benefits and the bailouts and the govt-sponsored safety nets (at least that's how the media makes it appear, I know lots of bankers have lost their jobs, etc, etc). If they can get away with it, why shouldn't we get our share? I mean, it's our turn, it's only fair, right?
People will always be greedy. I see it as you can get caught up in the greed, and the negativity, and the desire, and the want, or you can stop comparing yourself to others and focus on what works for you. Be personally responsible, get out of debt, or if out of debt, save.
I guess I just don't care about the Jones. Never have, never will. Unfortunately, some people do and they'll probably never learn.
Before getting jealous that they have a house and all the trappings (expensive car, clothes, vacations, etc), I imagine the debt coming due, the higher increasing interest rates, the sleepless nights, the money worry, whole thing, and then I don't really care anymore. That's my way of stopping the greed and want in myself from getting out of hand, since I sometimes feel it myself.
M, you're better off, and you know it.
I've noticed alot of my friends are feeling more entitled. One of my friends told me that my dad needs to help me out every month. Ummm, her dad pays her 420 a mth car payment. I think if you couldn't have afforded something you A.) Should not have moved out or B.) Should not have gotten a car you couldn't afford.
I don't know, your friends might have been like that anyway, they just feel more comfortable admitting it now. Money isn't as taboo, and talking about your money problems is the new hot topic.
I don't know how your friend is planning on tricking the system, but the government pays reward money for reporting stuff like that (I know for sure the IRS has it when people cheat on their taxes). I don't know how comfortable you'd feel with that, though.
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